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As I sat in my first sales training session as a facilitator many years ago, I watched a seasoned sales professional struggle to understand why his proven approach wasn't working with a particular client. His frustration was palpable as he exclaimed, "I've been selling successfully for twenty years - why isn't this person buying the way everyone else does?" This moment perfectly encapsulates what Ken Keis explores in his transformative works "Why Aren't You More Like Me?" and "Why Don't You Sell the Way That I Buy?" 

The truth is, we all fall into this trap. As trainers, facilitators, and HR professionals, we often unconsciously expect others to think, act, and respond as we do. It's a natural human tendency, but it's also one of the biggest barriers to effective communication and influence. 

Ken shares a powerful story about Sarah, a highly analytical manager who couldn't understand why her team seemed resistant to her detailed, data-driven presentations. She would spend hours preparing comprehensive reports, only to be met with glazed eyes and minimal engagement. The breakthrough came when she realised that while she processed information through numbers and analysis, many of her team members were visual and experiential learners. Her strength had become her limitation because she assumed everyone processed information as she did. 

This scenario plays out in countless ways across our professional lives. We might be relationship-focused individuals struggling to connect with task-oriented colleagues, or structured planners trying to collaborate with spontaneous innovators. Without self-awareness and understanding of these differences, we risk creating unintended barriers to communication and trust. 

The impact of this lack of understanding goes far beyond mere miscommunication. It affects team dynamics, sales relationships, leadership effectiveness, and even our ability to facilitate learning. When we operate from the assumption that our way is the "right" way, we unknowingly create resistance and disconnect. 

Drawing from Be More Effective and MLR's extensive experience working with global organisations like Vodafone and BMW UK, we've seen how enhanced self-awareness and behavioral flexibility can transform professional relationships. It's not about changing who we are - it's about expanding our repertoire of responses and understanding when to adapt our approach. 

The journey to greater self-awareness begins with understanding our own preferences, strengths, and blind spots. Ken's work provides a structured pathway to this understanding, combining scientific assessment with practical application. Through his e-courses, participants discover not just their own behavioural styles but also learn to recognise and appreciate different styles in others. 

What makes these resources particularly powerful is their focus on behavioural flexibility. It's not enough to understand differences - we need to develop the skills to adapt our approach when necessary. This doesn't mean being inauthentic; rather, it's about expanding our communication toolkit to connect more effectively with others. 

The transformation I've witnessed in professionals who embrace this work is remarkable. Sales conversations become more natural, team meetings more productive, and facilitation more impactful. Most importantly, relationships become stronger as people feel truly seen and understood. 

Ready to transform your professional relationships and enhance your impact?

Take the first step by exploring Ken Keis' "Why Aren't You More Like Me?" book and e-course, or if you're specifically focused on sales and influence, dive into "Why Don't You Sell the Way That I Buy?" Visit our e-course platform at https://www.mlruk.com/ecourses to access all these transformative resources. 

Remember, the journey to better relationships starts with understanding yourself. Your investment in self-awareness today will pay dividends in every professional interaction tomorrow. Whether you're leading teams, facilitating workshops, or building client relationships, the ability to understand and adapt to different styles is no longer optional - it's essential for success. 

Take action now. Choose the path that best suits your current focus - either the comprehensive self-awareness journey of "Why Aren't You More Like Me?" or the sales-focused insights of "Why Don't You Sell the Way That I Buy?"

Your future self - and all the relationships you'll build - will thank you for it.